Super Finale Conclusion Ending~!

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Kamora Millan
December 17, 2023

Dang, it's over already?

Hello, Hola and こにちは!It is...already December! WOW! Where did the time go to so quickly? I have no idea honestly...but now that I am packing my suitcases to head back it all is hitting me that...I'm heading back. I'm certainly more calm about everything than I was expecting to be. Even as I say finale goodbyes it isn't hurting that much because of one thought that I've been keeping present in my head. "I'll be back, for sure." I have to right? Because without that thought I feel like I'd be miserable to leave all of these amazing people—never to be seen again like some sort of amazing dream! I know this whole trip has felt like a dream come true but I can't just let things end like this, so instead I've been interpreting it all as new beginnings opening up. Yes! That is how I shall translate these feelings! In these last few weeks I've been running around trying to just do a few more things since we live in the moment and I'll rest after all of this is over! So this post shall just kinda be a rundown on what's running through my head and why that's making me run all over Tokyo with the vigor of someone with a mission to fulfill. 

To my Friends

These last few weeks have been just as fun as the rest however I realized that there was a tinge of melancholy to it all as we talked that I was trying desperately to not think about. It was simply that these would be some of the last times of experiencing a lot of random things together, and I was realizing that as soon as it hit December. People would ask when I was heading back and it would hit me, "Yeah I leave in a wee," and that was something to come to terms with. I tried my best to run around with my friends as much as I could in these last few weeks to try and get a few more memories squeezed but of course there is only so much one can do. As each day ticked on it felt like I was slowly being locked out of routes on a game, everything getting reduced down to one or two forms of contact rather than the constant in person interactions I had grown used to. There were going to be large time zone differences, schedules that wouldn't line up and just general life things that can make these relations fall into stagnation. However even with all of these things that threaten to stop the connection in this modern age people are just a text or a call away—so that is what I'll keep doing. The care is still there even if we don't interact as much as we used to, I just hope that the feelings stays the same you know? And next time we all meet up in person, whenever that is the energy will come right back~!


To my Host Family 

I want to thank my host family for literally everything they have done since this entire experience of being in Japan would have bee a completely different without them, and I couldn't imagine what it would be like without them. Their continuous kindness towards me went all the way up to the last day I was in Japan, and really beyond since I plan to keep in contact with them. The last day in Japan was just as silly and heartwarming as everyday with the family, as I very swiftly realized that I had to buy another suitcase to bring everything with me. We raced to the store and managed to get a very nice suitcase for a very cheap price (Thank you Book Off~) before heading to get one last meal together but also because there was one last present to give despite the countless memories they'd provided me. A photo book. Of all of those precious moments of us together, doing all sorts of things and smiling at it all. I did tear up a little bit seeing the heartfelt messages they wrote in the book for me but I didn't want to randomly start crying in this ramen spot so I kept it together pretty well. 

At the airport, I just felt so strange thinking about leaving my host family behind, heading through security and everything, I kept looking back and waving as much as I could. Even if I could only see the tops of their heads I kept waving, but then suddenly they weren't there and I thought "Well...I managed to not cry. Let's head down..." And then on the last escalator down I saw them waving and wishing me well through a window and man I did start crying a little bit after trying so hard not to. The enrichment they brought to my life is something I'll never forget and honestly I feel like they kinda made me feel like there is some good in this world yet. Although our goodbyes were tearful I just...I was so thankful to have them in my life and I want to make sure that this isn't a final farewell! I have to come back for the sake of everyone I care about in Japan!

Final Thoughts 

This entire abroad experience for me was something I will never forget, and has really made me look at things differently in the world. In a more hopeful way. It made me want to believe in people more, since I tend to be a little jaded with everything going on but...nah this was a very rejuvenating time for me. I want to continue learning Japanese since I've already poured so much time into it, but also because I want to continue talking to everyone back in Japan so to say I'm inspired to continue may be an understatement. I have a drive to continue after everything I got to be apart of while there! I suppose I'm looking forward to a few comfort things back in the States however I shall miss the clean toilets...and the on time trains...and the tasty food...and the cool clothes--There is a bunch if stuff that I will miss about Japan but really it comes down to the relationships I formed because man I will miss just having as much contact as I used to. Next time will be my reflection on everything after arriving back home so for now...Bye bye, Adios and じゃね~!

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Kamora Millan

I am an extroverted, amicable and overall goofy nerd who loves throwing herself in the deep end and coming back to tell the tale of how I did it! I love anything about culture, history and languages. I try to write for your enjoyment~

2023 Fall
Home University:
Southwestern University
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