A Perfect Chance to Be the You You Want to Be :)

One thing that has been alluded to from some of my other posts is how freeing it is to be abroad, especially in the sense of the release of expectations.  After coming home, I had even more time to truly reflect on my time abroad and how it has affected me as a person. The changes and realizations especially came to life after I chatted with some other friends who had gone abroad to different areas or at different times. There were numerous factors that allowed me to truly bloom during my time abroad both internally and externally.  From the people I had met to my own adventures I felt like I have grown into a much better person because of them. So, in this post I will touch upon three things that I feel helped me just let go of all my worries and live my life to the fullest. 

1. Social Life: 

   I'm sure I mentioned this previously, but nothing is more fun than being able to jump outside your comfort zone and strike up some friendly conversation with the locals. If you are still unsure let me, give you a peak of my own perspective on traveling to a new country for the first time with little knowledge on the native language. Don't be afraid to lean into being the foreigner who is trying to learn and is still struggling. A lot of the time people feel they need to be perfect at something before they put it into practice, I was also that way for a time. That way of thinking can quickly pigeonhole you and keep you from progressing in actually learning anything. 

   I found that when I leaned into not knowing much and trying to learn that meeting people and conversation became a lot less stressful and easier. Why is that you might ask, well I can tell you that at least in Japan they are just happy you are providing effort to learn about and participate in their culture. Often times the Japanese students I met also wanted to practice their English. It was an absolute riot trying to have a conversation in broken Japanese and English, but it also showed me there is an inherent understanding on both sides that people just want to learn. 

   Another point is that you can convey a lot with your body language alone, I can't begin to count the times I just guessed what a person was saying based on their body language. Being able to effectively communicate is such an important skill to have in all aspects of life. Communication is not just chained to talking and speaking, you can also communicate through actions and body language. I have met people who are not the best at communicating through action which when it comes down to it, turns out to be about 80% of social interaction. My friends who were in a higher level of Japanese had struggled when a person said something they didn't understand, they would often freeze up and not know what to do. I found I had an easier time navigating surprise social interactions simply because I was unafraid to look dumb and I could communicate effectively. By looking dumb I don't mean that in a negative way I mean that I had shed my worry of embarrassment and replaced it with the curiosity of learning. As many people say the best way to learn is by failure and learning a language is no different. 

2. Homesickness Remedies: 

   A common question that will always be asked no matter where you are is "are you feeling homesick". It was something that I was surprised to be asked so commonly, different variations of do you miss home or what do you miss that most at home were among the most common. And the common response usually falls around yes or kind of, for me I was not homesick at all. The only big thing I missed was my cat (because he's old and old cats do old cat things) but other than that I was not pining to go home anytime soon. Before you make any assumptions, my homelife is all good and dandy. 

   Yet I was not homesick in the slightest and this was for a number of reasons. One of the biggest was the contact I had with my family. While not every day, we would at least call once a week to update each other on life activities and those calls would last for hours. I realized this was a big factor in my lack of homesickness when I talked to others who had not had an easy way to contact home. So, the better you prepare for long prolong contact or find ways to assure you can have contact the better. Another reason is simply just the area I decided to go abroad in. Since Japan is one of the safest places to travel, I was free to go to a lot of places whenever I felt like. This was not the case for other places where dangers shone to be more prevalent, and when you are kind of trapped in having to travel in groups for safety it can feel a bit suffocating. While I can't give you a remedy for this it will serve as a little point to think about when you are deciding on a place to travel. 

3. Solo Travel: 

   The previous point touched a bit on why I could do this and here I'll give more in-depth reason on why this a a great thing to do (if it is safe to do so). Towards the start of my program, I was also a bit freaked out on going places by myself because of where my home school is situated. When you grow up in a not so safe for solo travel area you get used to having to travel in groups or at least with one other person. As time went by, I began to realize that it was actually safe to travel around alone in Japan (with reasonable awareness). I soon found myself enjoying the freedom solo traveling brought. Group trips are fun but after a while the constant lack of decision making and plan arguing to get tiring, especially when you are the one in charge of planning. So, when I took my first solo trip I was surprised on how much I loved it. 

   There's a certain beauty in traveling with yourself on random whims and not needing to come to a compromise on everything to keep the group peace. Heck on one of my travels I just decided not to book a hotel to stay in because it you be easier to just walk around at night and experience the world when no one else is awake. That move would definitely not fly if I was to be traveling with others. 

   Solo travel also just allows one to sit with their thoughts and experience the world in their own way.  The number of times I found myself engaging in casual conversation with the locals on my travels was very enjoyable. If I were to be traveling in a group those interactions would probably have been little to none. Simply because it is easier to live in the group bubble than talk to those who you don't know. Especially when you are in a place that does not speak your native language and vice versa. As a result of traveling alone I was able to talk to locals more freely and I found a lot more locals would come up to me if I was solo as well. In the end I would highly recommend you try to solo travel if it is safe enough to do so. It is such an uplifting and cleansing experience that I wish I could do all the time. 

I hope that everyone who goes abroad takes that change to shed their wings and fly to the sky. Take that chance to try the things you were afraid of trying. Be the you you always dreamed about being. Stop worrying about how others might perceive you and live your best life abroad. Discover things about yourself and the would you never knew before. I hope you are all able to come out of you abroad experience with a fire light in your heart (not the heartburn kind of fire though that wouldn't be good).