Llamas, Lederhosen, and Long Slides: My Weekend in Styria

Saturday

I had heard from an insider source that the one-night Styria trip is the IES Abroad staff’s favorite, so I was pretty excited for it. The short itinerary meant that we didn’t leave until Saturday morning, and I was actually able to fit everything in my backpack! We met at the Schönbrunn stop, which was a mere 15 minutes from my house, but a whole 45 from the Social Hub, the other IES Abroad student housing. District 5 reigns supreme. After a two hour bus ride, we arrived at a brunch restaurant, which I honestly forgot we were going to and had thus not saved sufficient room for. Luckily, I can always eat more, so I enjoyed my avocado toast. The brunch was probably a little unnecessary considering what was coming next: the ZOTTER CHOCOLATE FACTORY.

The way Jennifer (one of the trip directors) described it on the bus, she made it sound like chocolate was going to be forced down our throats until it was oozing out of our every orifice. “You will never want to eat chocolate again after this experience. Your chocolate stamina will be depleted after two bites, and yet it won’t let up. The chocolate will not stop coming until you are screaming for mercy from under a mountain of molten cacao.” I figured I’d be fine, because I really like chocolate.

We soon got to the factory and were ushered inside to watch a 25 minute, mildly racist documentary about the making of chocolate. It was actually pretty interesting to see how much work goes into it, and nice to know that the chocolate made by Zotter is all fair trade. Once the film was over, our Charlie Bucket adventure could begin! We each got our own individual tasting spoon, and I took a photo of this amazing statue on the way in.

We began in rooms that contained only raw ingredients that make up chocolate, like cacao beans and milling powder. When I sampled the cacao, I got a flashback to my crazy ex-stepmother urging me to try the raw cacao fruit she had acquired. Dark times. Anyway, all of this stuff was really gross, or as the kids call it, “Type 2 Fun.” When we got to our first room with chocolate fountains, everyone breathed a sigh of relief, until we realized that this molten chocolate contained no sugar. I’m sure if there were any diabetics in the crowd, they would’ve been thrilled, but we weren’t. Actually, if you’re diabetic, you probably shouldn’t go to this museum.

But soon after that, we entered the true draw of the factory — rooms with oodles and oodles of chocolate! Jennifer was exaggerating, but only slightly. Me and my friend elected to only try things that really appealed to us. When I did try something, I took the tiniest bite possible, thus preserving my chocolate stamina for as long as possible. I think I might have overcompensated a bit, because when we got to the end of the museum, I said, “That’s it?” Luckily, there was still the “running chocolate” station. In case you’re wondering how chocolate can run when it doesn’t have legs, the answer is it doesn't. "Running chocolate" means various chocolate items on a rotating conveyor belt. And it was delicious! Lots of exotic options like passionfruit, cappuccino, and caviar chocolate.

I also went with my friend to the “Edible Zoo,” which I assume sounds better in German. It’s called that because the idea is to get to know animals so you’re more aware of what you’re eating. Honestly, I didn’t really understand what this had to do with chocolate, but I was happy that I got to do another one of my favorite activities — petting fluffy guys. The zoo had a lot of different animals: llamas, donkeys, pigs (guinea and regular), and peacocks, to name a few. You could only really pet the llamas and the donkeys, but it was still fun to see all of them. There were also two AWESOME trampolines that I was sad I couldn’t jump on due to the age limit.

Overall, the chocolate factory was very memorable, and definitely worth the trip. We got back on the bus around 3:15. When we got to Graz an hour later, I was very sleepy from all the chocolate, but we still had to go on a guided tour of Graz. Our tour guide was very knowledgeable, but I wasn’t in the right headspace to listen to him. Still, we saw some awesome churches, and learned that Graz is the second biggest city in Austria.

The rest of the night was free, so I went to an Italian restaurant with a couple of friends. I got a pizza for 11 Euros, expecting it to be tiny, but it was HUGE. After dinner, we walked around a bit, and it was cool to see a bit of the city. We didn’t go to any clubs or anything because we were too tired.

Sunday

Sunday is the day of rest, except in this case, where it was the day of debauchery. This was one of the most memorable days I’ve had in Austria so far. We started with a breakfast at the hotel, where we were joined by a large group of identical muscle-bound men dressed in identical lederhosen. I asked one of the IES Abroad staff about it, and she said they were probably a traveling marching band. The more you know!

After breakfast, we loaded our stuff on the bus and were dropped off downtown for the activities portion of the day. We got to choose between three different activities: an art museum, an armory museum, and a big slide. Naturally, I chose the slide, because #YOLO. It was a pretty cool attraction, boasting its status as “the tallest indoor slide in the world” and its slide-time of about 40 seconds. It was also not purely hedonistic, because as we climbed the 9,000 stairs to reach the top of the slide, we got an amazing view of Graz. Even if you’re not into thrills, I would recommend the hike to anyone. (There is an elevator available for the price of 3 Euros.)

Then came the best part — the slide! Because it wasn’t in the US, we didn’t even have to sign any waivers promising not to sue if our legs fell off. Instead, I just strolled up to the slide, slapped its metal hull, and said, “Alright slide, let’s see what you’re made of,” before pulling on my aviator sunglasses and tossing my perfectly tousled hair behind me, sliding into the steel chamber like a bullet into a well-oiled pistol.

Sorry, I don't know what came over me there. You can just forget about that last part. As we were climbing the stairs, we couldn’t see the slide, so I had no sense for how long it was. The answer is: pretty long for a slide, but pretty short compared to some other things. I laughed like a maniac as I went down, hearing my every chuckle vibrate to the rhythm of the slide. The last ten seconds were the most fun, full of twists and turns, and I could feel my stomach dropping. It wasn’t the fastest or most thrilling experience I’ve ever had, but the fact that it’s just you and the slide for so long creates a sense of unity. For those 37 seconds, nothing else mattered. 

We got to see our speed and our photo at the end, and unlike the salt mine in Salzburg, we could take a photo of the photo on our phones. I bought one as well, for some reason. 

After the slide, me and my friend got breakfast at a cafe, and I got an acai bowl because I hadn’t had one in Austria yet. It was... not great.

Around 12:30, we got back on the bus and left Graz for Gramlitz (Austrian towns really need to work on their naming conventions), a small town holding their annual wine festival. When I saw “wine festival” on the trip schedule, I was imagining some kind of upscale wine-tasting experience, but what we got was so much better. It was a quaint Austrian town filled to the brim with people wearing dirndl and lederhosen, all day drunk off their local wine. Also, who knew dirndl could be so stylish?! I saw so many different variations, from pastel pink to goth.

The festival activities included getting drunk on wine (or Sturm in German), shopping at little stands, watching the incredibly slow parade, getting lost in the crowd of 5,000 people, and jumping in a sketchy bungee apparatus. I spent most of the time doing the first three; I don’t really like wine, but the Schilchersturm tasted like delicious fruit juice. It was also very cheap, at a price of only 4 Euros for a glass of pure wine (you could also get it watered down). I did have a very awkward interaction with a bartender when he asked me in German if I had been served yet and I had no idea what he was saying, so I had to confess to being an idiot American. You win some, you lose some.

As I mentioned, the parade was incredibly slow. It seemed like the floats were stationary most of the time, which made it less thrilling, but there was still plenty to watch. There was a fake cow on a float which dispensed wine from its udders into glasses to be handed out to lucky people in the crowd — which is also something you might see in a parade in Wisconsin. There were at least seven marching bands of people ranging anywhere from age 12 to 60, all wearing traditional clothing, and reading from tiny sheet music stands attached to their instruments. I thought the point of marching band was that you had to be memorized, but I guess not.

All in all, it was a very fun experience, and a unique opportunity to feel like we were participating in something “authentic.” I got the impression we were some of the only foreigners there, and yet it didn’t feel like we were ruining their fun. No one really seemed to notice or care that there were some American imposters in the crowd, and we got to enjoy a small, unique cultural experience.

In conclusion, I really enjoyed the Styria trip for its brevity and high concentration of thrills. It wasn’t as exhausting as the Salzburg trip, and all the activities we did were really fun and definitely worth the cost. I can definitely see why this trip is the staff's favorite!